I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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