hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
