he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
