elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
