I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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