I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Sext me about skeletons
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
