We're facebook friends in real life
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
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Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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