We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction