How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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