Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize