some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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