Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
