so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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