Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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