you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize