i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
