who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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