There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
