It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
