dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Redeem this text for a blowjob
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
