Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
