just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
