Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize