By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
