Where are you?
In a non slutty way
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Blood and glitter go together right?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
