Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
