Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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