i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
