stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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