new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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