Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Houston, we have a squirter
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize