Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
