Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize