we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
