Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
