I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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