yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
