Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
