Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
