I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
