I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize