Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
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