Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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