dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
