considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
