just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
