The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
