I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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