We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize