I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
