would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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