tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize